Robert “LaVoy” Finicum, When He Walked Among Men

It is the ultimate goal of all armed U.S. militia members to die in a blaze of glory. Or, anyway, to die. They know they can’t win, that most Americans regard them as dildos. Now that Robert Finicum was shot while grabbing for his loaded pistol, he is being touted as a patriot, hero, and—dare I say it?—martyr. He is forever frozen in time now that he has had his moment.

He can never go back to his eleven children in Colorado City, Arizona.

Wait a minute! Colorado City, Arizona. Isn’t that the isolated town in Northwestern Arizona that is run by the FLDS, the Fundamentalist Church of Latter Day Saints? Isn’t that the town ruled by Warren Jeffs, its patriarch, now serving time in prison for child sexual assault?

Is the late LaVoy a polygamist? Eleven children, but how many wives? How was that association missed by the national press?