Plague Diary 24: Zoom, Babies, and Barkies

Boredom Times Infinity

There are a number of stereotypes emerging from our months’ long quarantine: Zoom images of not altogether with it participants, small children, and pets—just to name a few. Being retired and not involved in alcoholism or recreational drugs, I am not into Zoom. There are zero circumstances which would call for a number of my friends and acquaintances being dragooned into meeting with me. Besides, I don’t have a camera on my PC at present. If I decide to get Skype or some other video telephony application, I might change my mind. Otherwise, nyet.

Pets and Babies Do Nothing for Me

It seems that most quarantiners have an irresistible urge to feature their pets and small children. That would have meant something to me decades ago, when I wanted to join that particular club. But having my pituitary gland and the chromophobe adenoma that devoured it removed at the age of twenty-one, I became ineligible to have a baby that looked anything like me. Nowadays, when I think of babies, I think of overfilled diapers. And I become comically allergic when I spend more than a couple hours with a dog or cat.

I would very much like to see my friends, but fortunately I am not going crazy from isolation. It seems that I am well-prepared for quarantining:

  • I have a library of several thousand books
  • I own hundreds of DVDs of classic movies, foreign and domestic
  • My cable TV gives me access to hundreds of free movies each week
  • I like to cook
  • I have a telephone

So I don’t have to shove pets and poopy diapers in your face, and I don’t need to appear on Zoom wearing nothing below my navel. You might call it the joys of sublimation.

Selfie Sunday

This Baby Smiles for Selfies

This Baby Smiles for Selfies

Visiting my family in Palm Desert, I was amazed by my niece Hilary’s little four-month-old baby. His name is Oliver Moorman, and whenever his dad Joseph (at the left in all the pictures above) takes a selfie which includes him, little Ollie cracks a delightful smile.

The other persons are, clockwise from the upper left:

  • My brother Dan
  • Martine
  • Hilary
  • My nephew Dan
  • Me
  • Just Joe and Ollie
  • My sister-in-law Lori
  • My niece Jen (in the center picture)

Even though Joe, Hilary, and Ollie arrived from Seattle with colds, it was amazing to see the baby stage such a quick recovery.

It has been a couple of decades since I’ve handled an infant, and I have to say the experience is magical. Oh, he did occasionally squirm and fret, but in every case it was like a small cloud scudding across the sun. Just wait a second or two, and the sun comes out again bright as ever.

All of us were entranced with little Ollie. May he live long and prosper—and always be happy!